Leadership
Friday, May 30, 2025
I’ve been ending one-on-one meetings with members of my team the same way for a long time: “Do you need anything from me?”
It felt like the right question. Open-ended, supportive, putting the ball in their court. I thought I was being a good manager by making space for them to voice their needs. But recently, I started paying attention to what actually happened after I asked it.
Mostly there was uncomfortable silence. Maybe a polite “No, I think I’m good.” Sometimes an occasional request for something trivial. The conversation would wrap up, and we’d both walk away feeling like we’d checked the box on our weekly one-on-one without really accomplishing much.
The problem wasn’t their response—it was my question.
“Do you need anything from me?” puts the burden on them to identify, articulate, and essentially justify their needs. It’s reactive. It assumes they have a clear sense of what I could help with and the confidence to ask for it. But that’s not how most people operate, especially with their manager.
When someone asks if you “need” something, there’s an implicit weight to that word. Need suggests dependency, maybe even weakness. It’s the difference between someone offering you food and asking if you’re hungry. One feels generous; the other feels like you have to admit to a deficit.
So I changed the question: “What’s the most important thing I can help you with this week?”
The shift in responses has been really interesting. Instead of polite deflections, I get real answers.
“I’m stuck on the technical implementation of that new feature and could use your perspective on the trade-offs.”
“I’m not sure how to approach the conversation with marketing about our timeline.”
“I’ve been spinning on the user research findings and need help thinking through what they mean for our roadmap.”
The language change did something I didn’t expect—it changed the entire dynamic of the conversation. Instead of me offering help and them having to admit they need it, I’m positioning myself as their partner who’s actively looking for ways to contribute to their success.
It’s the difference between “Let me know if you need anything” and “How can I help you win?” One is passive availability; the other is active engagement.
This small reframing has made me more aware of how language shapes power dynamics in leadership relationships. When we ask people what they “need,” we’re inadvertently creating a transaction where they have to justify their request. When we ask how we can help with what’s most important to them, we’re creating a partnership. We’re collaborating.
The best part is that it’s changed how I show up as a manager. Instead of waiting for problems to surface, I’m proactively looking for opportunities to add value. Instead of being a resource that gets activated when someone pulls the right lever, I’m engaged in their ongoing success.
It’s such a small change—eight words instead of six. But it’s shifted entire conversations, and honestly, it’s made me a better leader.
Wednesday, May 21, 2025
Retail Brew analyzing how REI is doubling down on diversity, equity and inclusion:
While REI is affirming its values now, the company, by its own admission, betrayed them earlier in the current Trump administration.
Full disclosure: I work for REI and what follows is my personal view from the inside.
Earlier this year the Co-Op signed on to an outdoor industry letter sent to The Senate Committee on Energy and Natural Resources supporting the nomination of Doug Bergum for Secretary of the Interior. Many REI employees were left confused, upset and feeling somewhat betrayed by a company whose primary purpose was to protect our public lands and work tirelessly to ensure the outdoors is accessible for all. We felt the letter was in direct conflict with the values that drew us to work at REI.
Since that letter was published, REI has a new CEO. In one of her first public statements as CEO, Mary Beth (MB) Laughton announced clearly and transparently that it was a mistake signing the letter:
Signing that letter was a mistake. The actions that the administration has taken on public lands are completely at odds with the long-standing values of REI…I’m here to apologize to our members on behalf of REI, to retract our endorsement of Doug Burgum, and to take full accountability for how we move forward.
At REI’s annual member meeting held on May 8th, MB made another public statement affirming REI’s commitment to DEI, even in the face of mounting pressure from the current administration:
In a time when our public lands and values like diversity, equity and inclusion are under threat, I want you to hear from me that REI believes these are essential to our business.
I feel like this is the kind of leadership REI needs right now. Admitting mistakes, owning the accountability for those mistakes, and charting a path forward honoring the core values that make the Co-Op a special place work. Most of us who work at REI don’t work there because we love selling tents. We work there because we love the outdoors. We want to protect it. We want to ensure people of all backgrounds and abilities can experience it. We want to make a positive impact in the world. With leadership like this at the helm, I still believe all of that is possible.
The retail industry is tough business. It’s even harder when the political current is working against company values. As I survey the room of other retailers and notice their actions related to the politics of the day, it’s very easy to see which companies are willing to sell out for political favor. I’m glad REI is not one of those.
Monday, March 31, 2025
Things have been quiet on the site lately and the reason is due to some professional news. A couple weeks ago I transitioned into into a new role at REI: Manager of Product Management for Front of House Technology. That’s a mouthful, but basically this newly-created role expands my responsibility beyond my current domain to include leading the product strategy for almost all the technology employees use to keep stores running smoothly and customers use to shop with us. Think point of sale & checkout systems, bike and ski shop services, apps that power sales floor workflows and our growing Re/Supply business.
The new role is a “player-coach” position and it feels like a natural extension of my work over the past few years. I’ll continue to have hands-on product management responsibilities, while taking on the added responsibility that comes with being a people leader. I now lead a team – and while I’ve done this in previous roles – it’s a new realm for me at REI.
I’m approaching this shift with open eyes and open ears. Good leadership isn’t about having all the answers, but about understanding what you don’t know, asking the right questions, listening with empathy, and creating space for honest conversations. It’s with this spirit that I plan to lean into leadership.
We have a lot of work ahead of us. What really gets me hyped is how these interconnected front of house systems — from browsing to checkout to services — have the potential to create a cohesive, amazing experience for our customers, members and employees. We’re not there right now. But we will get there eventually.
The retail technology landscape shifts quickly, and the boundaries between digital and physical experiences continue to blur. At REI, we’re embracing this head-on while staying true to our core mission of connecting people with the outdoors. In many ways, this parallels my own journey of finding balance between technological innovation and mindful living – my personal and professional sweet spot!
As with any new challenge, I’m approaching this role with both excitement and vulnerability. There’s so much to learn, systems to understand, and relationships to build. Things may be quiet around here for a while longer, but I’m super grateful for this opportunity, eager to continue my work with REI, and committed to leading with wholeheartedness. And as capacity allows I’m looking forward to sharing this journey as it unfolds.
Tuesday, December 10, 2024
You are an awful developer. In fact, to call yourself a developer is a complete fabrication. You’re not formally trained in code or capable of building anything more sophisticated than a rudimentary website. You’re a self-taught hobbyist whose curiosity has led you far enough to be dangerous.
You are a mediocre designer. In fact, to label yourself a designer would be skewing the truth and devaluing the work of those true artisans who meticulously craft delicate digital artifacts. Those perfectors of the pixel. Those framers of the future.
You are an average writer. You formulate and convey clear thoughts through the written word, however Hemingway you are not.
Your entrepreneurial and business acumen is nothing to write home about. Marketing doesn’t scare you, but you don’t enjoy it. It makes you feel dirty. Many people have made much more money in their profitable ventures. And you don’t seem to mind.
In light of these things you are not, you are able to see past the horizon. You understand how puzzle pieces fit together. You effortlessly connect people with resources and desirable outcomes.
You’re not afraid of hard work or sacrificing to get better. Your drive is a thing of wonder.
Your sense of direction is unprecedented. Some call it strategy. Others, leadership prowess. You leave it undefined, but know deep down it’s this nebulous mass throbbing in your chest that makes you special. It makes you different. It’s a thing of wonder.
You’re not a great coder, designer, writer or entrepreneur, but you might just be a great combination of those skills. Move forward with speed and confidence.
Tuesday, August 27, 2024
Jason Fried making an analogy that companies are like complex languages where new executives sometimes struggle to gain proficiency:
A casual browse through LinkedIn at C-level folks will unearth many short tenures. 2 years. 3 and a half. Sometimes just 1. It’s incredibly hard to become a high-expectation native speaker in such short order. This leads to what I call “churnover” — a high turnover rate driven by the churn of executives struggling to fully integrate into their new corporate language.
It’s an astute observation. I’ve seen this over and over during my time in retail. A new executive comes in, speaks an entirely different language, is unable to gain traction and ultimately leaves for greener pastures in short order.
The great leaders, however, are able to quickly assimilate into the existing culture. They learn and speak the language of the locals, while working to introduce new and effective colloquialisms as they earn trust across the organization.